The good was really good, and the bad was heinous.
Embarkation
1 out of 5
Embarkation in San Juan at the Pan Am terminal was run like it was the first time NCL ever loaded a ship. It took all told 4 hours for us to get on the ship after standing in the heat for more than 3 hours. There was no shade and water was not available for the first 2 hours. This is after having our boarding time pushed back until at lease 1:00. Traffic was a nightmare, the crew indifferent, and multiple times lines formed, split, and reformed because nobody provided direction until about 3:00.
Ship experiences
Food and Dining
4 out of 5
The food was quite good, and the drinks were generally made well. The pool bar seemed prone to randomly throw stuff into a glass a few times, but the other bars did well and served things generally timely. My wife got a lot better service than I did, so as she was happy, I was happy.
Onboard Activities
3 out of 5
The activities were alright. Nothing particularly special unless you’re really into CruiseNext pitches. Priscilla was a good show. The comedian used the same exact material on day 1 and day 6. Paul McCartney in the Beatles cover band was almost comically off, and I actually enjoyed it.
Entertainment
4 out of 5
Do not get the general seats to the Cirque show as they pack you six to a table meant for four and you cannot see the performers when they are lifted in the air. But the food at the show was good.
Service and Staff
1 out of 5
There were four staff that were friendly. Three guys in the sushi restaurant were terrific, and a waiter in O’Sheehans. Every...single...other...staff member was miserable. Seriously. Does NCL flog them in the back room before sending them out to interact with customers?
Ship Quality
1 out of 5
The bathroom design in the rooms are a well known peculiarity, but what’s gross is the curtain you draw may have never been cleaned. Ours had stains on it. I will also upload a photo later that showed almost half of the cabinets in room 14038 had not been cleaned in a long time. We left the balcony door open and the condensation on the cabinets showed they were not wiped down during our entire cruise. The ship is not well designed to move all those people, particularly when it rained outside, because there are choke points in certain hallways for only aesthetic purposes. Couple that with the proclivity of some people to stand in doorways and stairways, and bum rush elevator doors without letting people get off first, and you get a claustrophobic mess. Parts of the ship also didn’t seem to have air conditioning (the elevators have none either). The water was also out for part of night #6 and was a fine brown color the next morning. We were told to let it run for a few minutes and not worry about it, but why was it brown? It’s a mystery.
Cabin / Stateroom
5 out of 5
Ship tip
Here is my tip. If you are booking the San Juan Epic itinerary, check for the Bonaire travel authority first. NCL removed Bonaire from our itinerary a couple of days after the refund period ended, and Bonaire does not show the ship ever scheduled to port there. Don’t believe me? Look at the Epic itineraries in January 2020 and the Bonaire port schedules. NCL is selling itineraries with Bonaire on them, but Bonaire shows the ship is not going there. A shameless bait and switch.
The NCL excursion to the volcano stated 45 minutes by bus each way. It was actually 2 hours each way with 15 minutes at the Soulfrie (however it’s spelled) volcano. Refreshments as stated in the excursion details were a single glass of juice at a restaurant and the opportunity to buy food there. Meh.
Sitting in the Pan American terminal now for 2 1/2 hours waiting to board the Epic. So much for getting a 9:00 boarding time. It was like this when we left from here in 2019 - like it’s the first time they’ve ever loaded a cruise ship. I know this isn’t a review of San Juan proper, rather just one aspect, but the fact that they can’t get their act together means it’s the last time we ever sail from this dysfunctional place.
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