LIPSTICK ON A PIG

Before I get into my gripe about all of the things we did not like about our experience on the Carnival Freedom, let me start by saying that this review does not apply to the wonderful workers - room service, housekeeping, and dinner service. I should also preface by saying that we KNEW that we were going on an older ship in order to save money but DAYUM - this ship has probably not been updated in 20+ years! So think about it... pillows, lavatory, sofas, beds, yuck yuck yuck. 

Here are the things we did not like about this trip - and I will say that I have already spoken with Carnival Customer Service who said repeatedly that they will not give us any kind of response, courtesy call, or customer satisfaction benefits. 

* THE FOOD IS TERRIBLE - If you care about having fresh meat and produce in your food, this is not the cruise for you. Many people complained and apparently the Freedom has changed food vendors in the last year and the new one (American Table) is not as good as other ones. We even heard from other guests that they have had much better food on other Carnival ships, as I have had that experience as well. The buffet food looks like retirement home food (or Vegas buffet); the ice cream machines are dirty (we got a glimpse when they were refilling - putting yogurt in the soft serve btw); and we ate at our dining reservation only twice before we boycotted it the rest of the trip. My chicken looked like it was out of a Tyson's bag; the mushrooms tasted like old fish; and nothing tasted right. The recipes seemed well-conceived and prepared but the taste and quality are horrific. Many said that their meals were barely palatable. The only food we liked was either fried (burgers) or that we had to pay extra for - i.e. the Sun King Steakhouse, the Seafood Shack, and room service. Don't let them fool you with "free room service" - you can only get about 6 things for free. 

* THE PLACE STINKS - the buffet area smells like a truck stop bathroom and wherever you go there are strange smells in elevators and stairs. 

* NOT PEACEFUL - If you want to go on a relaxing vacation, do NOT book this trip. No matter where you go you are surrounded by loud people. Even on the "Serenity Deck" which is over 21 and supposed to be quiet, you will be surrounded by loud people. 

* We went with the balcony room which is really the way to go because there are no peaceful places on the ship - sometimes, not even the balcony. We had to ask them to clean it though because you could hardly see the water through the glass 

* ELEGANT NIGHT - They tell you to get all dressed up on elegant night, and then all throughout your dinner you are bombarded by picture vendors, dressed up pirates, and a loud annoying "dance" party put on by the wait staff in funny hats.... ugh WTF?

* EXCURSIONS on this trip are not accurate on their commute timing. They may say quick boat ride and an 1.5 hour bus ride to the Mayan Ruins - but it's an hour boat ride and a two hour bus ride for 1 hour to run around Chitchen Itza before almost getting left behind. A lot of the excursions are like this because the boat cannot actually dock in Cozumel and Belize so do not book excursions that have multiple activities or long commutes. 

* The spa is VERY expensive - there were very few options for less than $100, which is very strange for a  normal spa 

* The gym has no weight rack - basically all cardio, so it does not cater to health conscience individuals; military / fire / police; or you crossfit gurus. 

Moral of the story - we will NEVER book with Carnival and probably never do a cruise again. This cruise is trying really hard to put lipstick on a pig and dress up an experience that tastes, smells, looks, and feels disgusting and old. This really ruined it for us and was a huge waste of money.