We booked our cruise and were called with the offer of an upgrade/upsell to the "owners suite" or penthouse. It was expensive (an extra $250 per night) but after researching it and considering we had kids with us we thought we should go for it. The only question we asked was, "Is it very loud in the room?". This was the main complaint of most of the owners suite reviews. The lady (Kara) from Carnival said it was as if someone had the TV on at a normal volume in the next room. This was an absolute lie. It was more like someone running a lawn mower in your bedroom only with obscene amounts of bass from the music that would shake the clothes on your body. The deck chairs above the room were even louder if that's imaginable. Believe it or not I'm a very deep sleeper so after I went to sleep it didn't bother me but my wife was not a happy camper. I went to use the tub and found that the water that came out was yellow and smelled pretty disgusting. The "camp carnival" was a joke. They had limited hours. DO NOT feed the kids for you so you have to stop what you're doing to pick them up and feed them. They also had several times periodically throughout the day that parents were required to be there with them. It was so inconvenient that you would rather just not use their camp. We went to the back of the ship to let the kids play and realized that there was NO kids pool. instead there were 3 slides and a lot of slippery concrete for you children to slip on and hurt themselves. The height requirement was 42 inches so obviously 2 and 3 year olds are probably not able to ride the slides and CAN NOT ride with adults but good luck explaining that to them. After the disappointment of the slides we thought we would go to the pool. We found about all 2000 people on the boat all trying to find a deck chair and squeeze into a pool the size of what you would have in your back yard. Plus they were all either drunk or in the process of getting drunk. Definitely not the atmosphere for kids. You getting dirty looks form everyone for even having kids on the boat. I read all about how you get hassled by people in the Bahamas but that was not the case at all. The people on the boat in particular at the pool are the ones that hassle you. There are about 5 or 6 of them circling pool continuously asking if you want a drink (for about $10 to $15 a piece). Even when I had a drink in my hand or a bucket of 4 sitting next to me they were asking if I wanted another. They were so annoying. I couldn't even have a conversation with my wife because I was constantly getting harassed about buying drinks. I finally figured out to sit on the divider in the middle of the pool so they can't get to you to bother you. Everything charged to you is already given a 15% gratuity so don't bother tipping. They also charge you $11 and change per person per night for gratuities for your room and food and such. So 4 people x $11 and change = about $45 per night that they don't tell you about it until you are on the boat and have probably already been tipping people cash for the first day and night but rest assured it will be on your bill at the end. You will find yourself just trying to kill time by watching a 5 foot 8, 350 pound Scottish guy name Wee Jimmy or something tell lame jokes and make uncoordinated guests dance on stage for entertainment. I highly doubt you would actually ever want to waste your time at any of these shows if you were not trapped on a boat. You are completely on their timeline, not your own. The best part of this Cruise was being Not on the Boat. The Atlantis Resort was amazing and the beaches were phenomenal! If I had to do it all over I would have just taken a flight to the Bahamas and enjoyed the resort the whole time. Trust me. I read plenty of reviews and thought ahhh those people who said something negative are probably just the type of people that love to complain but I assure you that despite how this review sounds I don't like to complain and would have loved to actually have had a good time. This cruise is a horrible Idea if you have kids. I'll leave the food subject alone since different people like different things.
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Food and Dining
Very bland and stale plus the water had a sickly smell and taste to it.
Cabin / Stateroom
Service and Staff
I wish there was an option for worse than Bad here.
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