Contributor Level: Captain

More test pilot programs coming in the near future

so, I read the thing about the Splendor and the S&S cards.   I honestly believe someone at Carnival is betting on the stock going down, and bought several option contracts.   Anyway, I did some research and found out that there are several other  " test pilot programs "  being proposed by the cruiselines.  I thought I would give you a glimpse into the future of cruising.   Please don't ask how or where I did the research.   I can't tell you.    Just be glad, you didn't have to do it.


a). Carnival, will soon unveil a new program in their housekeeping dept.  Two cabin stewards per deck.  This will streamline the cabin cleaning process by having one steward responsible for each side of the deck. 


b).  Contracts, for staff, will be 11 1/2 months,  or until they drop dead of exhaustion.  


c).  "  Do It Yourself   "   towel animals.    Each evening in the activities paper, will be instructions on how to fold a different towel animal.   You learn a valuable skill.  Your steward gets to clean another cabin.


d).  Buffet dining all day long !    RCCL holdings ( Royal Caribbean ) has joined with CiCi's ( CeCe's ?)  in creating the worlds longest buffet.  No more MDR.  That space, oops, can't tell you yet.......   Anyway, yep, just grab a plate any time of the day, 24/7, and have some food.  Don't expect lobster tail though.  Surf and turf will be fish sticks and meatloaf.  " extra tartar sauce please ".  


e). MDR space will be converted.  Bouncy Houses, giant ball pits, batting cages, Boardwalk games of skill, and dozens of arcade games will be placed there instead.   Don't worry about cost, just,  swipe your card ".  It's like playin for free.  Oh, and don't forget the vending machine area.   No more ship store.  Everything you need will be available in vending machines.   Including Biffy Bags.   


f).   You'll feel like you're at home, because you now have to bring your own bed sheets, pillows, and towels.  Yes Carnival again leads the way in cost cutting measures.  They'll wash them, for a fee, except Diamond guests.  


g).   LETS PLAY PIRATE !!!!!!!!!!!    Yes, Norwegian is test piloting, on their newest ship,  The Wayback,  a history lesson.  Everyone learns how to work together, by heading down below the Fun Decks, and grabbing an oar and rowing that ship between ports.  


h).  and lastly, Holland America has purchased, for each of her ships, a machine that makes little green and yellow crackers.  The  " Soylent  Program "  will offer nutritious food over the course of the cruise.  Some people may notice shorter lines later in the week.   This is to be expected. 



As i as I continue to do research I will add more programs.



29 Answers

LOL!!!! You are hilarious. Hopefully no one from the cruise lines reads this...may give them ideas. 

Contributor Level: Captain

Oops, my bad.   The yellow is not offered.   Only the Green cracker.



wanna hear something ?   There is a company called Soylent, and they do produce a line of energy and health products.

Contributor Level: Staff Captain


Especially love the Soylent part.  One of my favorite books ever.

Contributor Level: Captain

Oh I sure hope the Wayback is skippered by Professor Peabody with first mate Sherman

Contributor Level: Captain

Hahahaha - keep posting your research finds BAK. Happy

Contributor Level: Captain


Agree :)


Contributor Level: Captain

Don't let the bean counters see that.......

Contributor Level: Captain

That's CAPTAIN Peabody.  Sherman sadly will not be onboard. Though far from being a service animal, with those glasses he actually requires one.


On the bright side, of The Wayback, if you man the same oar more than three times in the week, it's yours to take home.  Use it as a pizza oven, thingy.  Wack your kids without chasing them.  Imagine their surprise when you come back really strong.

Contributor Level: Cruise Director

And they all lived happily ever after


Contributor Level: Staff Captain

Too funny!


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